The Craft of Scene Writing

Here are additional questions that you can ask of your dialogue as you write:

• What is the line’s purpose?

• Can I express the beat with an action, gesture, or reaction?

Very few writers can write great dialogue from the start. Great dialogue writing is a craft to be learned and developed.

However, after you repeat this process a few times, you develop a habit, internalize the process, and eventually, it becomes an organic tool of your craft

Obviously, you won’t put every line of dialogue you write through the same wringer.

Personally, none of the lines except for the line in the film impresses me.

Eliminations: Is this a meet-and-greet or a meet-and-kill? / You fellas got something swirling around your heads, seem a bit nervous. / The number of horses you brought… ah, yikes! / Snaky, you look shaky. / Four of us, three horses, always a bridesmaid. / Three of you? I told Frank I travel light. / Shouldn’t you, you know, have one more horse than you do?

Eliminations: Is this a meet-and-greet or a meet-and-kill? / You fellas got something swirling around your heads, seem a bit nervous. / The number of horses you brought… ah, yikes! / Snaky, you look shaky. / Four of us, three horses, always a bridesmaid. / Three of you? I told Frank I travel light. / Shouldn’t you, you know, have one more horse than you do?

Which ones avoid being on the nose?

Eliminations: Are you here to kill me? / Is this a meet-and-greet or a meet-and-kill? / Am I to deduce from the number of horses that you plan to kill me? / Are you going to kill me?

Which ones capture the subtext clearly?

Eliminations: A surprise party? You shouldn’t have. / The number of horses you brought… ah, yikes! / So who’s walking? / Three of you? I told Frank I travel light.

Are you here to kill me? / Shouldn’t you have one more horse than you do? / Shouldn’t you have one more horse? / A surprise party? You shouldn’t have. / Is this a meet-and-greet or a meet-and-kill? / You fellas got something swirling around your heads, seem a bit nervous. / Am I to deduce from the number of horses that you plan to kill me? / The number of horses you brought… ah, yikes! / Are you going to kill me? / Snaky, you look shaky. / Four of us, three horses, always a bridesmaid. / So who’s walking? / Three of you? I told Frank I travel light. / You bring a horse for me?