When you have a sexual relationship with somebody, you have reduced that somebody to a thing. And in reducing him you have reduced yourself also to a thing because it is a mutual compromise: “I allow you to reduce me to a thing, you allow me to reduce you to a thing. I allow you to use me, you allow me to use you. We use each other. We both have become things.”
That’s why… Watch two lovers, when they have not yet settled the romance is still alive, the honeymoon has not ended, and you will see two persons throbbing with life, ready to explode – ready to explore the unknown. And then watch a married couple, the husband and the wife, and you will see two dead things, two graveyards, side by side – helping each other to remain dead, forcing each other to remain dead. That is the constant conflict of the marriage. Nobody wants to be reduced to a thing.